America's victory in the Kerala by-elections.....!

written and posted by nikhimenon@gmail.com

In the normal case i won't  have cared about the by-elections, as my 'idiotic' mind thinks that the whole 'circus' of making a member of the legislative assembly leave his office to contest for the parliament elections is like forcing  a husband to  divorce his existing wife for marrying another, as the rest of the XYs in the city have got castrated.But with the  'jhagada' over the Voters list and 'the deployment of central forces' making the headlines ,the by-election results in Kerala arouse some curiosity.

As expectedly, a flash about the results appeared in the  news channel (which has  reporters with  a 'I don't mind  raping a teenager for the sake of my channel's TRPs look' all the time)by noon.It announced the victory of the congress led United Democratic Front in all the 3 constituencies in Kerala where the by-elections were held.It was followed by a clipping in which the 3 elected candidates lectured about how they would work for the upliftment of the 'secular', 'peace loving' people of Kerala (thank God,no body asked them whether they had some plans to  kill all the 'communal','violent' people of the state!) or rather the  'mankind' as a whole in the next one and a half years of their life (or till they get screwed up by getting themselves involved in some scandal!) .As i was about to switch off my television ,still pondering about the possibility of being included in the 'violent' group (for having a secret fetish for bondage and domination videos) came the  second clipping in which one of the defeated (atleast that was what i thought before seeing this one) communist candidates was seen analysing the results of the election.(I should say that i am thankful to this great human being for clearing one of the greatest misconceptions of my lifetime) .As always,i  am sharing all the valuable information which i got listening to that  great human being with my beloved readers. 

1.The popular belief that UDF has won the kerala by-elections is nothing but a delusion.

2.In fact all the 3 communist candidates have emerged victorious 'technically' this time as none of the  'UDF' candidates could garner as much majority as they had garnered in the last Lok Sabha Elections.For instance, while during the last lok sabha elections the UDF  won the kannur constutency by 22,000 votes ,this time they could win only by 12,000 votes.

3.America and CIA are spreading 'false information' proclaiming  'the UDF victory' to destroy the mighty Communist party of India(Marxist).They are doing so  to force  India sign the ASEAN deal(which they have already achieved by now) and thereby make Indians eat 'American' food all the time.

4.Due to the pressure from America, more than 12,000  workers in kannur and 8,000 Christians in Ernakulam refrained from voting in favour of CPM which has 'given' a false impression of UDF victory.







In short America Has won the Kerala by-elections.....!